Jesus and ssa. and im sorry i am PISSED.

ok guys.

i am same-sex attracted.
but that's not my whole identity. im not "gay" or whatever.

i follow Jesus. im a sinner, im fallen, but i do love him and im here to follow after him and love him and live my life for Him.

i am SOOO freakinn pissed right now.

my friend jareth, like my best friend, or atleast friend im comfortable talking about anything with, sharing anything with, apparently gave my number to a lesbian chick and told her to text me - she texts me says, he said " you may need to talk to someone whose been through stuff..."

wow. ok wow jareth. like really?

i hate that he continues to support the other side? how i tell him about people i'm having issues with and he tells me its ok to explore it etc.

now he knows my desire is to follow the Lord and he gives my number to a lesbian?

like now i feel bad she texts me like my heart goes out to her, i hope for her to be fulfilled too and yeah it would be cool one day to talk to her and know her story or whatever.

except that's not the time right now, im not ready to, i have to flee temptation. i don't want to get sucked in to this.

i hate that he is like my best friend yet he is not a follower.... thats my problem.

im so pissed off right now, and im sorry whoever reads this. please pray for me. i hope God really settles my heart about this bc im pretty pissed at him. i know he is trying to "help" - but its not to help me and my goals. its to help what HE thinks is fine and good. but if i cut him off i lose my best friend. this is stupid. sorry to be saying all this. i hope you got that part that im a FALLEN follower of Christ... he's perfect.. i am not. im a pretty poor example of him. God please forgive me and help my heart right now because i am so pissed.